You cannot escape it. The discussion about
habits is all around you: Mom and Dad are constantly telling you to
break your bad habits; your teachers are telling you to develop good
habits; your friends are pressuring you to adopt their habits; and the
television and media are influencing you to explore new and supposedly
cool habits. "You will never be successful," the constant refrain goes,
"unless you drop your bad habits and develop some good habits." In the
end, it's all up to you. You have to decide what your habits are going
to be. Have you given this matter some thought?
If you are alive and breathing, you should constantly be
engaged in an inner struggle to develop habits which draw you closer to
Allah Most High. Success in this world is directly related to the
strength of your relationship with Allah. The farther one is from Allah
and the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon
him), the less likely one is to achieve success in this world and, for
sure, even less likely to achieve success in the hereafter. Is it not
time for us to reflect upon Islamic teachings to discern the necessary
habits of highly successful Muslim youth?
Here are at least seven habits indispensable for highly
successful Muslim youth, derived entirely from the Qur'an and the
teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).
Be Truthful
Being truthful is not always easy, especially when we
make a mistake. We fret over whether or not to disclose exactly what
happened. We sweat, we are afraid, we feel nervous and anxious. We are
often afraid that if we tell the truth about what we have done or said,
we will be in trouble with our parents or friends. What we forget is
that whether we tell the truth or not, Allah Most High knows exactly
what took place, even those things that were never manifest or visible
to people around us. Despite how burdensome telling the truth might
seem, all of us are aware of the feeling of relief we experience when
we tell the truth, even if the consequence of telling the truth is
punishment. Casting the telling of truth and the fate of the truthful in
terms of profit and loss, Allah Most High tells us in the Qur'an
[This is a day on which the truthful will profit from
their truth: theirs are gardens, with rivers flowing beneath — their
eternal Home: Allah well-pleased with them, and they with Allah. That
is the great salvation, (the fulfillment of all desires).] (Al-Ma'idah
5:119)
So much is to be gained from being truthful as opposed to
escaping punishment or blame because of not being truthful. Not being
truthful, in fact, leads us down a slippery slope, guaranteeing that
with one lie, more lies must be told. Being truthful is not an option
for Muslims, but rather an obligation, because our goal in being
truthful is Paradise. The beloved of Allah, Prophet Muhammad (peace and
blessings be upon him), said, as narrated by `Abdullah (may Allah be
pleased with him),
Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness
leads to Paradise. And a man keeps on telling the truth until he becomes
a truthful person. Falsehood leads to al-fujur [wickedness, evil-doing], and al-fujur
leads to the (Hell) Fire, and a man may keep on telling lies till he
is witten before Allah, a liar." (Sahih Bukhari, Book #73, Hadith #116)
Ultimate success is therefore achieved by living one's
entire life — the youthful years, the adult years, and the elderly years
— being truthful.
Be Trustworthy
Who do you rely on? Of course, Allah. He is indeed the
Most Trustworthy. But among humans, who do you rely on? Who can you
trust to come through for you all the time? Do people rely on you? Are
you considered trustworthy?Moving ahead in life, achieving ultimate
success, requires that people consider you trustworthy and reliable.
Being trustworthy should not be an arbitrary activity but rather a
habit so that you can be relied upon in all instances, big or small,
convenient or inconvenient, easy or difficult.
In colloquial terms, we often hear "I've got your back,"
implying, in the most literal sense, that people cannot see what is
behind them so they need to rely on their friends to cover that angle,
just in case a threat occurs from the back. Just imagine what it would
be like if a friend were climbing a tree and was heading out onto a
very thin branch to get a kite that got stuck there. She asks you if
you "have her back." In this instance, she is relying on you entirely
to hold on to her in case the branch breaks. There is no room for
joking around or for being distracted: your friend is trusting you with
her life.
When we say Allah is the Most Trustworthy, we are coming
to terms with the fact that Allah Most High will never let us down, will
never leave our side. He, Most High, says about someone who willingly
accepts Islam,
[Let there be no compulsion in religion: Truth stands out
clear from error: whoever rejects evil and believes in Allah hath
grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. And Allah
Heareth and Knoweth all things.] (Al-Baqarah 2:256)
Indeed, the prophets of Allah were all trustworthy people
and Allah attested to the trustworthiness of those who were doubted by
their communities. Prophet Hud, appealing to his community, declared to
them,
[I but fulfill towards you the duties of my Lord's
mission: I am to you a sincere and trustworthy adviser.] (Al-A`raf
7:68)
Practice daily developing the habit of being trustworthy.
Accept responsibility and then fulfill it. When others trust you, do
not betray their trust.
You can read in the beautiful biography of our Prophet
Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) how people used to entrust
him with their valuables, knowing that upon their return they would find
their valuables safe and unharmed. His personal and business practices
were commendable to the degree that he was known for it in his
community, even before he became aware that he was the Prophet of
Allah, literally one who is most truthful and trustworthy.
Have Self-Restraint and Be God-Conscious
Perhaps the most difficult challenge while navigating
adolescence is to restrain oneself from falling victim to one's desires
— especially one's lower desires.
Our success in life depends to a great extent on how well
we are able to restrain ourselves and to be moderate in what is
permissible, as well as how capable we are of distancing ourselves from
what is impermissible.
Why is self-restraint so critical? Satan's goal is to
make you a slave of your desires to the extent that you eat until you
are actually uncomfortable; that you consume without restraint
beverages made of caffeine, sugar, and artificial flavors; that you
find yourself longing for sleep more than prayer; and that you yearn to
satisfy your sexual desires. Developing self-restraint as a habit
entails making self-restraint your second nature — something which is
done almost without thought, without too much effort. We are reminded
by Allah Most High,
[And no one will be granted such goodness except those
who exercise patience and self-restraint, — none but persons of the
greatest good fortune.] (Fussilat 41:5)
In seeking to be highly successful Muslim youth, that is,
youth deserving of the greatest fortune, it is imperative that you
develop self-restraint.
An interesting parallel is that, throughout his Qur'an translation, the late Abdullah Yusuf Ali translates taqwa as self-restraint. While taqwa
is most commonly translated as "God-consciousness," one realizes
without much effort that the height of self-restraint is full and
complete understanding that one is indeed conscious of one's duty to
one's Lord. How awesome will it be if you can look back at your life
and say to yourself, all praise is due to Allah that I did not succumb
to my lower desires and instead exercised self-restraint consistently!
Be Thorough
Look around your room. How many unfinished projects do
you have? When you work on homework, are you likely to rush through the
assignment just so you can be done with it or are you more likely to
take your time, to check your work, and most importantly, to be
thorough?
Often teachers will grade a report based on how well and
to what extent the student covered the topic at hand. Being thorough is
not a habit that is developed overnight. The opposite of being thorough
is being incomplete, being rushed, and working in haste without any
regard for accuracy or quality. The most perfect is Allah Most High,
Who perfected creation, Who perfected our religion, and Who guided His
Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) to be the most
perfect among humans in behavior and in character.
We read in the Muwatta of Imam Malik "Yahya
related to me from Malik that he had heard that the Messenger of Allah,
may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, 'I was sent to perfect
good character'" (Book #47, Hadith #47.1.8).
To be thorough stems from a desire to be perfect to the
extent that this is humanly possible. Seeking perfection in our actions
and speech from an early age helps us to develop a keen eye, not only
for thoroughness in our own life, but also for thoroughness in the
lives of those around us. Being thorough in prayer, for example,
teaches us to be patient and to concentrate upon the words we are
reciting and the different positions of the prayer.
Be Focused
One thousand ideas go through your head the moment you
stand up for prayer. Is that you? Really? What do you make of those
ideas? Do you process them? What about when you are sitting in class?
Do you find your mind wandering, daydreaming, and unable to focus on
the lecture at hand? Are you likely to use any excuse whatsoever to
leave what you are doing?
Developing the habit of being focused ensures that you
are awake, alert, and totally motivated to work on and complete the task
at hand, whatever it may be. Being distracted early on in childhood by
video games, fast-paced imagery, and constantly changing scenes on
television shows contributes to an inability to concentrate, to focus.
Among the best ways to develop focus is to practice praying with deep
concentration to the extent that you are almost unaware of your
surroundings. Allah Most High tells us in the Qur'an that the believers
are
[those who humble themselves in their prayers] (Al-Mu'minun 23:2)
The humility referred to here results from total focus
and concentration on the fact that one is in the presence of Allah,
standing before Him, Most High. Do your best to develop focus, no matter
what activity you are engaged in — whether in prayer, in academics, in
athletics, or some other pastime.
Be Punctual
Stop saying over and over again that you are late because
of "Muslim standard time," or the "standard time" of your particular
ethnicity. The last thing we should attribute to Islam is the notion
that its teachings somehow make us late, slow, slugging, and anything
but punctual. What a sad state of affairs, indeed, that we attribute
our own weaknesses to our religion or ethnicity!
Highly successful individuals, be they Muslim or not,
understand and appreciate the value of not only their time but the time
of everyone else with whom they interact. Keeping people waiting for
hours on end is neither something to be proud of nor a habit that has a
place in the mindset of a person who tries to be successful.
One of the central pillars of Islam is prayer, and Allah
and the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) have given us
clear reminders that we are to establish prayers at their due times.
When `Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him) asked
"which deed is the dearest to Allah?" the Prophet Muhammad (peace and
blessings be upon him) replied, "To offer the prayers at their early
stated fixed times" (Sahih Bukhari, Book #10, Hadith #505).
If indeed your day is to be considered successful, you
must have prayed all the obligatory prayers at their established times
and as many voluntary prayers as possible. If your day is planned
around the times of prayer, you should not pray exactly at the time
when you are to pray but then come late to all other appointments.
Being punctual is a habit which, when perfected, demonstrates to others
the tremendous value that Islam places on time — not only ours but
that of everyone else with whom we interact.
Be Consistent
Apart from all the habits listed above, perhaps the one
that is sure to help you become a highly successful Muslim youth is that
of being consistent. One cannot be truthful one day and a liar the
next; one cannot be trustworthy in one instance and totally unreliable
in the next; and so on for each of the other habits. A Muslim
understands from an early age that it is easier to do something once or
whenever we feel like it but much harder to do something regularly and
consistently.
Indeed, the Mother of the Believers `A'ishah (may Allah
be pleased with her) narrates that "the most beloved action to Allah's
Apostle was that which is done continuously and regularly" (Sahih
Bukhari, Book #76, Hadith #469).
Regular and consist actions show that a person has
thought about it, has intended to do it, has planned to do it, and
therefore does it.
We urge you to be as consistent as possible, especially
in those areas of your life which need constant improvement, such as
your prayers, your fasting, your manners, your studying habits, etc. Do
not say, I am going to pray all day every day, or fast voluntarily all
of the days of every month, or study all night every night, because
such actions cannot be humanly sustained over a long period of time.
Say on the other hand, I am going to be sure to read at least one part
of the Qur'an every day, or I will strive to help my parents with at
least one household chore every day, or I will try to study at least
one new item every week so that I can be ahead of the lesson plan.
Conclusion
Finally, Muslims aspire to develop all of these habits
because, in doing so, we draw nearer to Allah Most High. If you are
intent on being a highly successful Muslim youth, then you owe it to
yourself to reflect upon your own life and see how many of these habits
are already a part of who you are and how many you need to further
develop or acquire.
We end with a reminder that developing these habits will
help you to emulate the life of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace and
blessings be upon him). His message and his life are summarized well in
a narration of `Abdullah ibn `Abbas:
Abu Sufyan told me that Heraclius said to him, "When I
enquired of you what he (Muhammad) ordered you, you replied that he
ordered you to establish the prayer, to speak the truth, to be chaste,
to keep promises, and to pay back trusts." Then Heraclius added, "These
are really the qualities of a prophet." (Sahih Al-Bukhari, Book #48,
Hadith #846)
Strive to develop the s
. Ibn Taymiyyah, may
Allaah have mercy on him, said: "Festivals are part of the laws, clear
way and religious ceremonies of which Allaah Says (what means): 
and Ibn Al-Qayyim 
narrated that there was scholarly consensus on this point.
