Tips on How to be a Pleasing and Happy Muslim Wife

• Make Dua to Allaah Swt to make ur Marriage nd Relationship Successful.
  It’s simple nd easy, but forgotten. All good things are frm Allaah Swt  so why do we forget to ask Allaah Swt for the blessings of having a successful marriage ?? This amazing relationship fisabillah begins in this Dunya nd continues on – by the Mercy of Allaah Swt – into Jannah. Always ask Allaah Swt for forgiveness nd blessings on ur marriage everyday.

• Listen nd Obey, he is ur Key to Jannah.
  Obeying ur husband is Fard upon you as long as it doesn’t clash with Islam ! ur husband is the Ameer (commander, ruler) of the household. Give him tht right nd respect tht Allaah Swt has blessed him with. Be the best wife you can be in sha Allaah without letting arrogance or pride get in the way. This is another form of jihaad nd rewardable in the same way, so if he is difficult, be patient with him nd if he is good be extra grateful to him. Always seek to please ur husband, for he is ur key to Jannah. Rasul Allaah – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam – taught us tht any women who dies in a state where her husband is pleased with her, shall enter Jannah.

• An Argument is a Fire in the House.
  Extinguish it with a simple ‘I’m sorry’ even if it is not ur fault. When you fight back, you are only adding wood to the fire. Watch how sweetly an argument will end when you just say sincerely, “Habibi, I’m sorry. Let’s makeup nd be best friends again.” Pick ur battles. Nagging nd nitpicking can destroy a relationship, so dn’t do it for irrelevant or unimportant things. For instance, dn’t nag him abt the mess he leaves in the bathroom  or how he cleans up the kitchen, if he is making an effort to help you in tht way then tht alone is something to be grateful nd thankful for. So Let him do things his own way. Dn’t stress over the small stuff. Focus on wht is important.

• Thank ur Husband Constantly for the Nice Things he Does.
  Allaah Swt says, if you dn’t thank people then you have not thanked HIM. So if ur Habibi comes back from work one day with some chocolates for you, but they ate not milk chocolates tht you like, they are dark mint chocolates tht ur not so fond of, lol it’s ok to still show ur appreciation nd excitement. Thanking him for his every effort is a show of appreciation nd encouragement for him. This is an important trait, as the opposite is a characteristic of the women of hell fire.

• Joke nd Play Games with ur Husband.
  A mans secret: they seek women who are light-hearted nd have a sense of humor with a big smile on her face, not moody, grouchy nd boring. Dn’t rely on him to start the conversations, make the first move nd start the play fight ALL the time. Make an effort to take him by surprise, be confident nd bubbly. Give him a fake remote control nd let him change you to wht ever mode he wants. As our blessed prophet Rasul Allah – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam – told Jabir (raa) to marry someone who would make him laugh nd he would make her laugh.

• Be Confident abt Yourself !
  Be secure in urself. Putting urself down in front of him is another way of insulting his taste in women. Doing this will open his eyes to flaws in you he never even noticed nd wouldn’t have if you hadn’t made it apparent in the first place. If he is with you, it’s bcz he wants to be. Just bcz you dn’t find urself to be attractive looking or sexy this doesn’t mean he thinks nd feels the same way. Remember tht ur attitude, confidence nd willingness, play a large part of being wanted nd attracted to. Poor self-esteem nd lack of confidence have very negative side effects in marriage. Make sure to create nd maintain a fun nd interesting intimate relationship. Expecting ur husband to reassure you nd compliment you continuously all the the time, making him work extra hard to get you to loosen up, relax nd enjoy urself with him, will tire him out. He will eventually feel himself working to fill a void he cn’t. Do you want this to lead him to feel inadequate and unhappy ?? Believe in urself nd believe tht you are beautiful nd act the part, no one else will know or feel  any different.

• Understand nd Respect ur Husband’s Rights.
  Study authentic hadith nd make sure tht you understand ur obligations as a wife as well as understand ur rights. In Islam, a good wife is expected to be honest, sincere nd congnizant of her husband’s needs. At the same time her husband must respect her, appreciate this nd fulfill her needs also. Our blessed prophet saaws despite all his responsibilities, found time to even sew his own clothes nd sweep the home, helping in household chores.

• When ur Husband comes Home, Greet him with a Wonderful Greeting.
  Greet ur husband with a smile nd a loving kiss nd hug, make him feel welcome nd greatly missed, make him feel special nd well cared for. Imagine ur husband coming home to a clean house, a sweet smelling nd attractive wife, a dinner prepared with care nd thought, clean nd nicely dressed children, a romantic nd organized bedroom – Ponder over wht would this do to his love for you nd his longing to race back home to meet nd greet you ??  Then imagine how the opposite of the above would effect him

• Use ur ‘Beauty’ to Win the Heart of ur Husband.
  We may not always have all talents, some women are good at baking others may be more educated, some are talented in reading Quran some may be better with children nd family, but one thing is for sure, all women have the ornaments tht Allaah Swt blessed them with. Use the beauty Allaah Swt has bestowed you with to win the heart of ur husband. Knowing how nd when a suitable time is to discuss certain topics is a talent tht takes time to master but when you have done so you will reap the fruits of it’s benefits. Show ur love, affection nd appreciation in more ways than one.

• Express, dn’t Accuse.
  Except in the rare event tht ur husband happens to be psychic, dn’t expect mind-reading powers. If you want something, ask. If something is wrong, say so in a respectable manner. Dn’t drop hints or stay moody nd assume he’ll “catch on”. Communicate calmly, sweetly,clearly nd directly. Relationships work best when each partner expresses their current emotion without the sarcastic remarks, bringing up past issues or harping on wht he/she has done. Sometimes a simple ‘I feel hurt’ is all it takes for him to step back nd ask, “Why?” Then simply say, “When you slammed the door, I felt ignored.” or wht ever is relevant. Let the “I feel” be ur guide.

• Dn’t Expect Perfection.
  Unmet expectations tend to frustrate everyone. It’s never going to be perfect, as boring as it sounds, it requires team effort nd a lot of patience, as neither of you are perfect.Only Allaah Swt is perfect nd His Islam is perfect, so keeping urself focused on ur religious goals nd using each other to help you get there will keep you close to each other nd successful. Set standards tht are obtainable so tht ur expectations of each other are not too high. It’s unfair to expect a better way of living for example nd still have the love of ur life home for every meal. Should you want more one to one time with ur husband, be prepared to have tht desire fulfilled at some expense. Accept him nd love him unconditionally as you would expect to be loved nd accepted. He is a growing individual, just like you are. Help him grow in the direction tht he chooses, nd give him the chance to help you in the way he knows best how.